It is the first time I have felt capable of writing for a long time now. It has been a sequence of long journeys, trips, days looking at the windowpane sitting next to the bed, mornings tripping on the asphalt next to the bus stop.
What changed? Not much. Not that much. A movie, maybe... It is cinema, once again. It frees, it moves, it makes me part of something that I never could have been part of otherwise. And there is so much to be part of, so much! We must catch up, so much happened already before we were born. There is so much to see, learn, hear and feel. So much more coming up! It is like the world just cannot be comprehended and yet, we cannot help but trying. The merit, beauty and satisfaction must be in the attempt.
And tonight I feel like anything can happen. Like I can put on a really large hat and listen to rock'n roll, belong somewhere else, go back to a time outside of time.
Someone asked me today about love, about wanting someone to be with you forever. I do not know, I do not care. Sometimes we really need to stop thinking about this megalomania on personal relationships. We all, as a society, need to tune out of this greed, greed for people. We want more and more love, attention, care! As if that was an infinite resource. Accept it is not, be angry, have your world shattered. And then fall back into your empty bed, slide down to the floor. See the beam of light illuminating the dust in front of you. Close your eyes and stay there, covered in gentle silk and faded cotton. You'll find your balance, your strenght, yourself. In that dusty room.
I will say no more. There is little point, actually. It has been one of those perfect summer days. In my mind.
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